I am sitting at Melbourne Airport waiting for my flight home to Sydney. We were supposed to board at 12:40pm for a 1:00pm departure but the plane has an electrical fault which is effecting the inside lights. Whilst we were supposed to land at 2:30pm, we will now be departing at 2:45pm.
The airline has just advised us that no other plane will be coming to this gate so we should feel free to leave and get some food or stretch our legs and closer to our boarding time there will be plenty of seats back in our gate’s lounge. Earlier, just before the original departure time, the gate lounge was packed and I had some young jet-setters sitting not far from me who were really excited to be headed off on an overseas holiday. They were talking fairly loud as some early twenties or possibly late teens would, so I was by no means eavesdropping.
“I HATE people who leave their rubbish on the chair,” exclaimed one of the girls seeing the carry bag of some fast food joint sitting on a seat she was about to sit on.
This has been a bugbear of mine for a long time; the use of the phrase “I hate people who…” And so she inspired a post. I LOVE people who do that.
“I hate people who talk on their mobile while standing in line….”
“I hate people who talk with food in their mouth…”
“I hate people who over use hyperbole…”
What I believe should be used in its place is “I hate it when people….”
Let’s just imagine for a second that Angelina Jolie (who arrived in Sydney today to start filming her next movie in Australia) was the culprit. Just imagine that it was this Hollywood star – adored by many – was the one who left the rubbish on seat for this young lady to see and make that comment about. And for the point of my argument – and that is possible also too strong a word in this context – let us imagine that this young holiday maker was the BIGGEST Angelina Jolie fan.
Let us imagine her bedroom wall plastered with posters, her bookshelf packed with all of Angelina’s movies on DVD. Let us imagine their holiday destination is Los Angeles where she’ll be visiting the studio back-lots where Ms Jolie has filmed some of her movies and going on a star tour to see the front gate of the Pitt-Jolie residence. Now watch as I apply the rhetoric…
“I HATE people who leave their rubbish on the chair…”
No you don’t. You do not hate the person who did that but right now you are not impressed by their actions. Okay, it’s semantics, I know, but I believe it is rather harsh to say you hate the person rather than hating their action. Remember the saying “hate the sin, not the sinner?” That is what I’m talking about.
I want to teach this to our children. I want them to be wary of their choice of words. Not just with what I am describing here, but in the words and phrases they decide to use in their whole life. I truly believe that the words we use can shape our own mindset. Negative words breeds negative thoughts, negative thoughts conjures negative words. It is a vicious cycle.
As our boys get older I will listen to what they say because I am very mindful of what I say, the words I choose to use, and what I am trying to portray in a conversation. I don’t want to have to qualify everything I say with disclaimers and cross references so I to use the correct terminology up front. And I want them to be mindful of their own choice of words so yes, I will pull them up and correct them if I hear them use hyperbole and rhetoric that is unnecessary.
And I know at this point I have more than likely angered some of my readers. I know that there will be many who will read this and think things along the lines of “no one who hears the comments of those who say they hate someone who does something and actually believes they do hate the person in question” and that’s fine that you think that. But I believe you’ve missed my point.
And I hate people who miss the point that I am trying to get across.
I hate it when people miss the point that I am trying to get across.
Thanks for taking the time to read this. I would truly appreciate to hear your thoughts on this.