The Conspiracy Theory To Believe If You’re Not A Conspiracy Theorist

I’m not a conspiracy theorist. I don’t believe that everything is a government cover-up. I don’t believe that “Big Business” has ulterior motives for everything they do.

Don’t get me wrong, I know that there are things that the government hides from us and that large companies do things that suit themselves, but the ridiculous claims that some writers, bloggers, vloggers and social media commentators make about them make me laugh. Well, those that don’t make me cry for how sad these individuals seem to be.

But if there was one conspiracy theory that I could get on board with, it would have to be this one…

Moon landing photo from Wikimedia Commons
Moon landing photo from Wikimedia Commons

The moon landings and man walking on the moon. Fake. Fake I tells ya.

Here me out.

While driving back from seeing a customer last Friday I was listening to my favourite talkback (talk radio) station and as happens every Friday, the host of this time slot is joined by two semi-regular guests to discuss news stories that happened in the past week. They do this with humour being the angle that they are going for on a Friday afternoon. I can’t remember why they brought up conspiracy theories, but one of the guys suggested that the moon landing hoax theories could be plausible.

The other two guys ribbed him and laughed at his suggestion that the twelve people who have walked on the Moon are lying. Between July 1969 and December 1972, as part of the Apollo program, a dozen men journeyed, along with other crew to that big chunk of rock that follows our planet around the sun. And like many strange people of the Interwebs, he was open to this suggestion that all of these landings were faked.

I couldn’t just stand by idly letting these two men rip into to him (or sit actually, I was driving remember?) As a result, I called up the radio to let them know why it’s not a bad idea to become a moon-landing conspiracy theorist.

The Conspiracy Theory To Believe If You’re Not A Conspiracy Theorist

I have this idea that many of the conspiracy theorists, be they the ones who believe the US Government captured aliens, or the ones that believe that The Illuminati exists and control the world, actually believe in these notions for one fact and one fact alone; they want to be proved wrong or die finding out their “truth.”

See, I think that conspiracies are like a lottery, and being a conspiracy theorist is nothing more than playing the lottery. Sure the odds are long, but what if you were the one that NASA picked out of the long line of moon-landing hacks and said;

“Well if you don’t believe us, why don’t you come up to the moon and we’ll prove it to you?”

That just may happen one day. It might. The US Government may decide that it’s time to revisit the moon and who better to take than someone who doesn’t believe that we’ve ever been there? I mean, if you build a loyal following of your blog, vlog, or social media page shouting to the world that the National Aeronautics and Space Administration is nothing more than a glorified movie studio, why wouldn’t NASA pick you to be the one that takes that rocket ride into outer space to plant your feet, albeit enclosed in a space suit on the moon?

So let me be the first to tell you loyal readers of Modern Father Online that I too believe that it was faked, and you, as my readers MUST believe what I say. Also, tell your friends and family to follow my social media accounts. All of them…

I promise you won’t be disappointed when I share photos with the hashtags #moonlanding #Iwaswrong and #nahjustkiddingweareactuallyinamoviestudio.

So, which conspiracy theories do you believe in? Do you have any friends who believe in weird shit?

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