If We Let The Gays Marry, Maybe I’ll Have To Eat Raw Tomatoes

Back in May 2012 actor and comedian Seth Rogen tweeted this;

“Claiming that someone else’s marriage is against your religion is like being angry at someone for eating a donut because you’re on a diet.”

I don’t know if he was the originator of this as I’ve seen it in meme form which may have pre-dated his tweet, but then again, knowing that people like to steal other people’s quotes and make memes of their own, as I wrote about here, it’s possible that it was his quote and all the rest followed.

Someecards are infamous for having people use their meme makers to make memes of well known one liners.
Someecards are infamous for having people use their meme makers to make memes of well known one liners.

There’s been more talk again about same-sex marriage and homosexuality with the hate speech by that pastor and singer Kim Burrell forcing Ellen DeGeneres to cancel Kim’s pending appearance on her show to promote her song on the Hidden Figures soundtrack.

I don’t get it. I really don’t. Fuck homophobia is what I say. (Seriously, I do say this, often. Maybe too often).

Now I’m not gay myself. I have a cousin who is gay, but we’re not that close so it has no real bearing on my own decision to be supportive. I have gay friends, but again, I have felt this way long before I became good friends with anyone who is in a same sex relationship, or who wants to be.

This is something that I have had rolling around my head for a long time and I have hesitated to put it down in writing, but I feel that I need to to get it off my chest and out of my head.

I don’t like raw tomatoes. They make me feel sick. Just the thought of them makes me feel sick. I can’t bring myself to eat them. My older brother made me eat one when we were young and I threw it up, and all over him.

if-we-let-the-gays-marry-maybe-ill-have-to-eat-raw-tomatoes

Wait, what? When did this become about my dislike of the fruit that’s really a vegetable pretending to be a fruit? It’s simple, let me explain.

For me, the way that I came to realise that being gay wasn’t just a weird thing that weird people do, and that some people are just pretending to be gay is that I couldn’t be gay myself. I like women. I like naked women. If I had to graph it or chart it out of 100 percent, I am leaning 100% in favour of being a heterosexual man. See chart below.

I had to say 0.1% for the men. I mean Chris Hemsworth, seriously, he's a handsome dude...
I had to say 0.1% for the men. I mean Chris Hemsworth, seriously, he’s a handsome dude…

Okay, I’ll admit it, there’s some good looking dudes, but no, I couldn’t turn for them. And I’ll also admit that whilst checking out some naked women in NSFW videos (how about that for not actually writing porno on my blog. D’oh. Damn, I wrote it) there have been some guys that I’ve thought “he pretty much wouldn’t look twice at that woman if he wasn’t getting paid to have sex with her,” implying that I think he’s probably a better looking guy than the female porn star is a good looking woman, but never once have I thought that I would prefer the guy over the girl. Not once.

I just couldn’t do it. It’s like eating a raw tomato to me. It makes me feels sick. It doesn’t disgust me. I’m not against other people eating raw tomatoes. Hell, I even prepare them for my family and friends. Knowing how healthy an option they are to eat, I would encourage people to eat them.

And that’s probably where I would stop the analogy. I’m not about to encourage people to go gay. “Going gay” isn’t something people do just to piss off homophobes. It’s not something that people do to fit in with the crowd. Sure, I expect some people muck around with the same sex as being curious, or drunk, or, I don’t know, because they are bored, but if you are truly gay, you are truly gay. All the deprogramming in the world ain’t gonna stop ya being gay.

This quote has been fact checked. Kurt Cobain did say this during an interview 'I am not gay, although I wish I were, just to piss off homophobes.'
This quote has been fact checked. Kurt Cobain did say this during an interview ‘I am not gay, although I wish I were, just to piss off homophobes.’

I could go on with a millions reasons why it’s none of your business that if you don’t want to be gay you shouldn’t stop people from being gay themselves. The internet is full of people telling you this. But I just thought I’d share my tomato story because I’ve had this in my head for way too long and I needed to share it.

I’ll leave you with this. Sometimes, especially now that I am vegan, I wish that I could eat raw tomatoes. I look at others eating them on hamburgers or in salads and these people look like they are enjoying them. It has often gotten to the point where I am jealous of people who eat them because I can’t eat raw tomatoes. I just can’t.

But when I look at LGBT people, I am not jealous. Right now, there is nothing to be jealous about. It would suck for them being treated badly. It sucks for them that they are looked down upon. It sucks that laws are in place to stop them from marrying who they love in certain parts of the world. It sucks that they have to often hide the fact that they are gay, or bi, or transgender. It sucks.

And it makes my raw tomato situation seem frivolous.

marriage-equality-australia
I support the Marriage Equality Australia campaign. Click here to visit their website and get on board speaking up for justice and equal rights for everyone.

2 thoughts on “If We Let The Gays Marry, Maybe I’ll Have To Eat Raw Tomatoes

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